Frequently Asked Questions
Does my child need to be a strong writer?
Absolutely not.
In fact, the kid staring at a blank Google Doc with absolutely no idea where to begin may be exactly my kind of client.
Some children naturally express themselves through writing. Others are much better at talking through their ideas first. We'll figure out what works best for your child and build from there.
Wait…are you writing my child’s D’var Torah for them?
Nope. That would kind of defeat the purpose.
The goal is for your child to stand on the bimah and deliver a D’var Torah that sounds unmistakably like them – not like me, their parents, their rabbi or a very articulate chatbot.
Depending on the package you choose, I’ll help your child brainstorm, make connections, organize their thoughts, develop their stories and strengthen their writing. I’ll ask lots of questions, make suggestions and offer plenty of editorial guidance along the way.
But the ideas, and ultimately the D’var Torah, belong to your child.
Why wouldn’t we just work with our rabbi or cantor?
You absolutely should!
Your clergy and synagogue educators are an essential part of preparing your child to become a Bar or Bat Mitzvah, and nothing I do is intended to replace their guidance.
Think of me as an additional member of the team.
Clergy members have many students, families and responsibilities competing for their time. I can provide something different: dedicated one-on-one time focused specifically on helping your child develop their ideas and turn them into a compelling piece of writing.
And if your rabbi or cantor offers feedback on the D’var Torah along the way, great! We can incorporate it.
Couldn't we just use AI?
Of course. AI can be a fantastic tool.
But writing a meaningful D’var Torah isn't simply about generating a well-written speech. It's about figuring out what your child has to say.
That's the part I love.
I want to hear about the soccer tournament, the summer at camp, the friendship that changed, the obsession with Taylor Swift, the time they completely bombed the science test, or whatever else has helped shape the person standing in front of me.
Sometimes the most interesting part of a conversation comes five questions after a kid initially answers, “I don't know.”
AI can help put words on a page. My job is to help your child figure out which words really belong there.
What if my child hates writing?
See above. :)
Writing doesn't have to be the starting point.
We can talk. Brainstorm. Tell stories. Make lists. Toss around terrible ideas until we find a good one.
Sometimes taking away the pressure to immediately write a D’var Torah is exactly what helps the ideas start flowing.
Do you interpret the Torah portion for my child?
We'll explore it together, but I'm not presenting myself as your child's rabbi or Torah scholar.
Your child's clergy and educators remain the primary resources for religious instruction and interpretation.
What I can do is help your child examine the themes and ideas within their portion, ask questions about what resonates with them and help uncover connections between the text and their own life.
That's where the fun begins.
How far in advance should we start?
For the All In package, I'd recommend beginning approximately 8-12 weeks before the Bar or Bat Mitzvah whenever possible. That gives us enough time to get to know each other, explore the Torah portion, brainstorm, write and revise without turning the process into another last-minute source of stress.
For Meet Me in the Middle, approximately 4-8 weeks is ideal.
For The Basics, I recommend sending the completed draft at least 2-3 weeks before the ceremony.
Have less time than that? Reach out anyway. If my schedule allows, we'll see what we can do.
Do you meet with students in person or virtually?
Both, but if you live in the Houston area, I strongly encourage us to meet in person at least once, especially for our first session.
There’s something about sitting together, face-to-face, that simply can’t be replicated on a screen. This is particularly important for my All In students because so much of our initial work isn't actually about writing. It's about getting to know your child: talking, asking questions, hearing their stories and figuring out what makes them tick.
I've found throughout my professional and personal experience that human-to-human connection can make all the difference when you're trying to get someone to open up and express something meaningful. And when we're asking a middle schooler to write something as personal as a D'var Torah, that connection matters.
Virtual sessions are always available, and for families outside Houston, we can absolutely complete the entire process virtually.
For local families, though, I'm also happy to continue meeting in person throughout the process if that's what works best for your child and your family.
Where do in-person sessions take place?
For Houston-area families, I'm happy to meet with your child in your home or at another mutually agreed-upon location.
Local travel within my standard service area is included. For families located farther away, an additional travel fee may apply based on distance. We'll always discuss that ahead of time. No surprise charges.
Do you work with families outside Houston?
Absolutely.
As long as we can find a mutually convenient time to meet virtually, your child can be almost anywhere.
Do you work with every Jewish denomination?
Yes. My role is to help your child with the writing and development of their D’var Torah, not to replace the religious instruction provided by your synagogue, clergy or educators.
Every congregation approaches the B’nai Mitzvah experience a little differently, and I'll respect the expectations and traditions of yours.
Can parents participate in the sessions?
Parents are certainly welcome to help provide background and context, especially at the beginning.
But whenever possible, I'd like much of the actual brainstorming and writing process to happen directly between your child and me.
There's a reason for that: kids sometimes give very different answers when a parent isn't sitting next to them.
And we're trying to discover what they want to say.
What happens if our rabbi or cantor asks for changes?
Then we make changes!
Clergy feedback is part of the process, and I want the final D’var Torah to meet your synagogue's expectations. I also really value their advice and suggestions because centering their work around the Torah is literally part of their job.
If the requested changes fall within the revision rounds included in your package, we'll incorporate them there. Additional substantial revisions beyond the package are available at the current hourly rate.
What counts as a "round of revisions"?
Good question, and an important one.
A revision round means I receive one updated version of the D’var Torah, review it as a whole and provide my edits and feedback.
In other words, sending five separate emails containing five different paragraph changes doesn't count as one revision. :)
Don't worry. I'll make the process clear so everyone knows when a draft is ready for my next review.
How long should a D'var Torah be?
That depends on your synagogue's expectations, so your clergy should always have the final say.
If you've been given a target length or time limit, we'll work within it. Part of my job is helping your child determine what deserves space in the speech and what can lovingly be sent to the editing-room floor.
Can you help with delivery too?
My primary focus is writing and development, but once we've spent all this time creating a great D’var Torah, of course I want your child to feel comfortable delivering it!
Presentation coaching can be added as an additional session, including pacing, emphasis, eye contact and helping your child become more comfortable speaking the words we've worked so hard to put on the page.
When are sessions available?
Because I'm working with middle schoolers, I don't want our sessions to begin five minutes after the final school bell rings.
Kids need a minute.
Most weekday appointments will generally be available in the late afternoon and early evening, giving your child some time to get home, decompress and have a snack before we start asking them to contemplate the deeper meaning of Torah.
Limited weekend appointments may also be available.
Specific availability will be provided when scheduling.
Do I have to pay for the entire package upfront?
No. A deposit is required to reserve your child's spot on my schedule, with the remaining balance due in installments over the course of our work together.
I know the months leading up to a Bar or Bat Mitzvah come with plenty of expenses, so I'm happy to work with families on a reasonable payment schedule.
The exact deposit and payment dates will be provided before we begin so that everyone knows what to expect.
For smaller à la carte services, payment in full may be required when booking.
What else can you help us write?
Apparently, Bar and Bat Mitzvahs require a surprising amount of writing.
I can also help with parent speeches and personal prayers, ceremony program content, Shabbat dinner or luncheon remarks, party toasts and other written pieces connected to your celebration.
If you're staring at another blank page thinking, “Wait, I have to write this too?” – ask me.
How do we get started?
Reach out and tell me a little about your child, their Bar or Bat Mitzvah date, their Torah portion (if you know it) and where they currently are in the writing process.
We'll figure out which level of support makes the most sense from there.
